5 Simple Ways to Boost your Confidence Each Day
Okay, real talk… Do you ever feel kinda insecure? Do you have days when your inner-critic is just a little too loud?
We all need a confidence boost from time to time.
Whether you’re facing a job interview, a date, or just needing some day-to-day motivation, here are five ways you can build more confidence everyday.
1 | Repeat affirmations
I thought affirmations were pretty cheesy when I first heard about them. I wasn’t convinced that standing in front of my mirror and telling myself that I’m a beautiful, badass boss was going to make me a beautiful badass boss.
But affirmations actually do work - and there’s science to prove it.
In case you don’t know, affirmations are short, powerful statements that “affirm” your positive beliefs. Such as “I am brave, I am beautiful, I’m capable of handling any challenge I face.”
Studies have shown that affirmations activate the reward-center of our brain, just as receiving a compliment or winning a prize would do.
Try a couple on for size. The trick is to find one you BELIEVE. If you don’t love your body, don’t try to tell yourself that you love your body. Instead, tell yourself how much you appreciate your body and how to want to treat it well. That way you don’t fall into the trap of cognitive dissonance (aka when your thoughts don’t line up with your beliefs).
Affirmations can be great reminders for how you want to feel about yourself and all the confidence you want to build.
2 | Find your hype squad
I know we all wish we had the Queer Eye’s Fab 5 hyping us up every morning.
But even if you can’t have JNV or Tan Fran come to your apartment and remind you what a QUEEN you are, you can still find people who can remind you of your value when you’re feeling down.
The right support system can completely transform your self confidence.
What does your friend group look like?
Maybe it’s time for an audit. If you were to be vulnerable and share your insecurities with your friends, how do you think they’d respond?
I’m not encouraging you to ditch your crew if they don’t routinely hype you up, it’s just an opportunity to become aware of your friendship dynamic and make a few adjustments.
Maybe it’s time to add some positivity into your current friend group, encourage each other to connect whenever one of you is feeling a little insecure.
OR…
Maybe it’s time to widen your circle. Find women in your town who are ambitious, women who can inspire you.
They say we become the people we spend the most time with - so spending time with more confident people = you becoming a more confident person.
Also, if you want a supportive friend who gives you a self esteem boost when you need it most, be sure to be the friend to someone else.
Consider when’s the last time you gave one of your girls a genuine compliment. If you’re having trouble remembering, you should probably grab your phone and send one.
3 | Work through insecure thoughts using cognitive reframing
Improving your self esteem isn’t always as easy as getting hyped up by some friends or repeating affirmations. Sometimes it takes working through your toughest insecurities and retraining your brain to think more confidently over time.
This is where cognitive reframing comes in. This psychology practice helps you rewire your brain by having your approach your insecure thoughts in the following process:
Recognize the thought - what thought is making me feel insecure?
Understand the thought - what is triggering this thought?
Challenge the thought - How might this thought be untrue? (or if it is true, what impact does this have on my life?)
Replace the thought - What could I think instead?
This process helps you become more aware of the insecure thoughts you tell yourself and trains your brain to shift the conversation in your mind automatically.
It takes repetition, though. Just like a musical instrument, you’ve gotta practice again and again in order to do it naturally.
The Create Your Confidence Journal walks you through the process of cognitive reframing to help you work through your insecurities and build more confidence over time. It’s all filled with self esteem boosting journal prompts and inspo from life coaches. The Create Your Confidence Guided Journal is now available on Amazon.
4 | Do one thing outside your comfort zone
Our self esteem often takes a hit when we’re facing something we’ve never done before. The insecurities in the back of your head may tell you that you can’t do it or that people are judging you.
But the more you do things outside your comfort zone, the more you prove to yourself that you can do it. Your comfort zone widens the more you venture outside it.
Find little ways to step outside your comfort zone. Attend a networking event or a virtual happy hour, compliment a stranger, try something new.
You’ll be surprised how much confidence you can build by getting a little uncomfortable.
5 | Put it into perspective
So you’re feeling insecure and you’re worried that people are judging you or you’re worried you’re going to fail. Sometimes you just need to be smacked with a little bit of tough love served with a side of perspective.
This is your one and only life. Why are you spending it being concerned about what Susie Q thinks about how you look or how well you did on your presentation?
If you were to knock on death's door tomorrow, is this what you’re going to worry about? No way! You’re going to be thinking about all the ways you lived your life to the max, the risks you took and the memories you made.
We shouldn’t have to wait until we’re on our deathbeds to fully embrace this idea. We should take each day as an opportunity to let go of insecurities and only be concerned about making the most of what time we have left on this planet.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Content Creator | Self-Help Junkie | Mental Health Advocate
Laura Maloney created The Self Set as a platform to share tactical strategies and honest conversations around overcoming insecurities and embracing authenticity. She recently published the Create Your Confidence Guided Journal to help women use the process of cognitive reframing to work through insecurities and build more confidence over time. You can find Laura at theselfset.com or on Instagram @theselfset.